Sunday, November 23, 2014

Thankfulness.....

*a new house
*plenty of food
*closet full of clothes
*husband
*healthy children
*salvation
*friends


     It's easy to rattle off a list of things that I am thankful for, blessings that I don't deserve but God has graciously supplied me with.  I have been trying to think the last week of things that I thankful for that are not on my normal list.  Things that don't come to mind immediately....


     Music.......   I don't listen to music a lot because I am not alone much, but on Mondays when I have a short drive between stores I have started listening to music that just speaks to me. It may be a variety of genres and you would probably smile at some of it. But I always feel more peaceful after 15 minutes of listening...


   Christmas Lights....... I love to sit and look at lights, candles and Christmas d├ęcor. Something about the soft light and the sparkly ornaments and greenery makes me feel happy inside. and it always reminds me of my Grandma. She never had a light in or on her house because it was against her belief to decorate. But she told me several times that she loved to look at the lights and secretly she would like to have some. It makes me feel close to her when I sit and enjoy them.


    God is FOR me......    This was in our sermon this morning. I don't always feel this, it's hard to when it seems like the world is out to get you at times. But I want to believe this..... and if I believe enough, the feelings will come along too.


   Employees......    They come and go as life brings them into my life and sometimes life takes them on to other places. But I learn from each one and each experience. I have been blessed many many times from their lives and friendships. I know I bumble and stumble as I learn how to be a boss and how to manage our business, and learn how to say things and to handle life. God has given me many fine people to learn on! 


  My Girls....  I always wanted to be a mama. I figured I would like it. But I never knew it would be something that I loved so much. Living life with these girls has been one of the biggest blessings in my life. Homeschooling them for 8 years and now experiencing school with them....  Seeing them grow up, being a sports mom, interacting with their friends....  It isn't an easy job, I fail daily and I wonder how they will ever amount to anything with my mistakes, but they are God's and I am so thankful he chose me to be their mama!


 My Customers.......  This is something I wasn't expecting when we opened up our store 3 years ago. I didn't realize how many relationships I would make, all the people that would be in my life on a weekly basis. Sometimes when I go out and I run into someone who knows me around every corner of a store, every event..... they comment on the things I am buying, about the restaurant I am eating at, on my outfit since I am out of "uniform", etc.... I feel just a bit paranoid and exposed. Sort of like I have to be "on" all the time. Then I remember all the kind words that are spoken into my life and the blessing of having all these caring people in my world! I really stopped and noticed the other day when a sweet little man came into my office and asked if I was getting enough rest... I told him I was doing fine. He asked me again if I was sure. I reassured him and he said , "ok, my wife is worrying about you and she will ask me first thing when I get home!" It really did touch me and remind me again of this blessing of not being alone......


  Friends.....  This is a no-brainer. And it could be on the easy to say list up there. But I think of the unexpected friendships that God places in your life. Ones you look back at and think, wow.... I didn't see that one coming! After being in the business world for a couple years I felt like I really needed another woman who knew where I was coming from and maybe could give me advice. I asked my pastor if he could recommend someone. Another lady from church was talking to him too.... It was a God thing.  One time there was a lady on an airplane with me, I wasn't looking for a friend. But by the time we landed I had one, one that I share coffee, music, jokes, and pictures with..... through technology. We live miles apart but she has filled a spot that was empty in my life and adds humor at the needed time.


   Until next time... Kristy


 
       



Friday, May 16, 2014

What a Woman Needs.......

   Often as I pass the magazines in the check out line this title jumps out at me from various sources. Or we hear it on a talk show, in a sermon, or someone just telling someone else what they need......  It is something I have thought about a lot the last years as God has taken me on a journey to finding what I "really" need. 
    In my life it comes up more often in the Spring time of the year....  it is Valentine's Day, our Anniversary, Mother's Day, then my Birthday.....  it is Very Very easy to start thinking about what I "need" to be happy. If only I would get that romantic gift, if only I would have a birthday party thrown for me this year, if only my children would do this, if only my husband would say these words..... 
     What really made me think about it lately was a friend who was telling me about the wonderful Mothers day sermon they had. I am not saying it wasn't or downing the thoughts of the Pastor, I have no clue who he is or what church he is from!  But she said how he had a list of things women/mothers/wives need. The affirmation they need to be better women.  I am in total agreement that affirmation is good :), it happens to be my one of my strong love languages and words stick with me for a very long time......
    BUT......   what if we don't get it? What if you are separated/divorced/alone, what if you just don't get it (like we think we should or in the right words)?????  Can we not be the woman God wants us to be without this?  
   God has been hammering in my head for a long time now and I feel like I am finally grasping a tiny piece of what he is saying....  No matter if I do get affirmed, loved, taken care of etc....  it will never be enough. I have to be content and saturated in HIS love. I have to know who I am as a Woman of His. 
    I have always sort of struggled with the Proverbs 31 woman, I got just a bit ticked at her. I mean, who even wants to work like that?  And then as a friend of mine asked years ago in Bible School.... "Why does the woman work like crazy and then the MAN get praised in the gates?"  I started a study lately called, Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be from this passageIt's been good, and I see this chapter in a bit different light.
     It's given me a longing to quit looking at what I have or what I don't have. To stop comparing and wishing...  to even quit feeling guilty because if they start a list of what a man needs, I will fall so short the first hour, my poor husband might as well walk away.....     But to continually look at God and what He thinks of me! Not what anyone else is saying or has told me about myself!  There is a place for others input in your life and you need to stop and listen. But there are also a lot of lies that people tell you, by their actions and words.....  and subconsciously you start believing them and suddenly you realize you are NOT being who God created you to be!
    
    The first verse that I was to memorize in this study was : Who can find a woman of noble character? Her worth is far above rubies. Her husband has complete confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.    


    I have thought on this verse for days and weeks now. It isn't about how much I can do for my husband to make him happy, how hard I can work so he lacks nothing......  I truly believe it all comes back to how rooted and grounded I am in God. The peace I will radiate because I am IN him. And through this...... comes the complete confidence and not lacking anything.  AND after that, my needs are met, because I know who I am in Christ.  It is God who truly fills all those needs, wants, and desires.  The things we get from humans are just extra blessings. 


   I have a long ways to go, I slip up daily.......   but I thank God for keeping on pounding it into my head and heart. Because I am quite sure of one thing.....  this is where my true joy comes from. And I can not bless others without that joy.


   
 

Monday, January 13, 2014

Winter Funk

*(disclaimer....  I am under the full realization that a Southern Winter doesn't really count as a true winter..... but)


     I totally am in disagreement with the song "Summertime Blues". Warmth, Sunshine, Blue skies, bare feet, short sleeves, pools....  my list could go on and on. I will definitely be working on a song to replace that... "Wintertime Blues".  :)


     I hate to acknowledge the fact that I am so affected by weather. I would like to believe that I am totally oblivious to it because I am a Pollyanna who lives in a wonderful world of Positive Thinking and always thinking happy thoughts, but it just ain't always the way things roll around here.  I do know that I can change my outlook on life and it does happen...... but sometimes around this time of the year I just find myself feeling bluer and bluer and bluer.
  
     November and December may be cold but normally I am working so hard and long that I don't really pay much attention to the outdoors. I see it briefly in the morning and briefly at night and the rest of the time I am either working or falling exhausted onto couch or bed. And I know that there is a brief vacation time ahead and I will just hold on till that.  But come January and February it just starts working on me.   It may not always be cold and/or wet, but a lot of times it is. And while we do experience sunny days in those months, the grass is still brown, the trees are barren and things look blah.... and I start to see life as blah. Nothing, I mean nothing looks fun anymore.


    Yesterday I sat in my chair, thoroughly enjoying the day of rest and I felt myself get gloomier and gloomier. I was quite sure Eeyore was sitting beside me, just telling me gloomy things in his super gloomy voice.   From past experience I know this doesn't just get better or disappear. I finally made myself get up, put my rusty running shoes on head down the road. I found me a new Bluegrass Band that I enjoy :) and I listened to them for 2 miles....    Things looked much different when I stepped back into the house.


    I bought a bouquet of flowers to put on my kitchen counter and I burn candles whenever I am at home. Anything to fool this crazy brain into thinking thoughts of cheer.  What are ways that you combat this Winter Blahs?


   ***************************************************************************


       I know I often write funny things that my customers say or do. I try to make sure that I never say it in a derogatory way, because I really don't mean it like that. I just find a lot of humor in some things and I figure if I write them down I will remember them later. This may sound odd, but I get a kick out of some of the older gentlemen that come in on a weekly basis and always have so much to talk about. Somedays I sort of egg them on........  :)  The one has a very healthy wife and so  I asked him what her remedy would be for this cough that Jesse and I just cant get rid of. He was telling me different things and suddenly said.... You and Jesse have to quit sleeping together! One of you needs to go to the couch! It is just feeding that cough between you.....   I had a hard time not giggling over that one!


      On a sad note, more and more customers come in and tell me about their partner having cancer. It scares me.....  over and over I hear it. I try to listen as long as I can because while the one who is experiencing the sickness has it rough.  I think the caregiver has a hard time too. Most of them seem so worn out and weary of trying to take care of everything and also being emotionally strong for them. My heart aches for them all and I will admit.....  I fear just a bit. It seems to be (when), not if it will be me!


    Well, my work is waiting ......  it doesn't seem to realize I sort of wanted to putter around today and just forget about it!   I shall make time to go use my pedicure gift card I got for Christmas. I think some nice bright toes may be in order today! :)


                                        Blessings, Kristy


Winnie the Poo....    Lovely day, isn't it?
Eeyore......... Wish I could say yes, but I can't
.

Sunday, November 24, 2013

   People ask me often how in the world I keep up with my busy world. I haven't the slightest clue. If I ever wrote down what all I do in a week , and who all I have to keep track of, I would probably get depressed. There are many days I get a bit spaced out because of computer...err brain overload.  There is a limit to how many things can be processed in a mannerly fashion and I exceed that limit weekly.
   From last Monday until next Wed night my busy life is on steroids. Not only is it Thanksgiving Week, but from certain circumstances that have come about, I have had to add a few responsibilities that normally are not mine and hopefully will be taken away sometime soon. But it will all come out in the wash and while I am very tired there are lots of bright spots. It is probably because since laughter is the best medicine....  we are kept well. We laugh uproarishly many times each day. Well, I say we... it is mainly the head baker and I and now we have added another number to our mix that is laughing right along with us.
   My dilemma is this.... we have decided for the morale of all involved it would be wise to be closed, not only Thursday, but Friday also! So here is a whole, long day staring at me... empty, just waiting to be filled. Normally I always sacrifice and give spare time to my girls, but I am selfishly thinking this one may be about me.  Shall I lounge on the couch all day with a cup of coffee? Shall I clean all the dirty corners? Shall I sew curtains for my bare windows? Shall I paint a room or 2 that I have been wanting to? Shall I decorate the empty space above my cabinets that keeps glaring at me so reproachfully? Oh the many ideas that flow through my head.  Somehow the best thing that comes to mind is to lie on the beach......
   I am sure I will have plenty of time to figure it all out. :)  There is just a Thanksgiving Party in the 4th grade, McKayla is cheering at a basketball game, Alexis is playing her first basketball game, there a gazillion turkeys to tend to, and bread to bake, and food to prepare, and well...... all I want to eat on Thanksgiving Day is a big pot of greens.
   I say all this in fun and laughing.... but deep down in the serious part of me, I am very, very thankful that I am in a good place. There have been many days in my life that I wasn't in a place that I found much to be thankful for. I allowed myself to wallow in ugly and hurt and despair. Circumstances are still circumstances and they always will be. But I am thankful for the blessings God has given me.  Happy Thanksgiving, Friends!

Monday, November 11, 2013

   It's Monday again....  basically the only time I get to sit and think. And then sometimes on that day I just sits too.  Now it is bugging me where that phrase comes from. I do believe it is the talkative old lady who took Anne (with an E) somewhere one time.  "Sometimes I sits and thinks and sometimes I just sits".  I have this crazy ailment or whatever you want to call it, that at any given time a certain word will just bring something else to mind. Most of the time it is a song. I have been told I have a song for every word or phrase.....  It creates many laughs at my work establishment. My one employee and I are known to burst forth into song over any comment.  :}

   But, that is not really what is on my mind today. Yesterday we were Encouraged to Encourage....   There is just a lot of awful stuff in this world and we all have junk we are dealing with and for the most part stress levels are higher then ever.  Depression and that "navy blue" feeling isn't uncommon in a lot of lives. So it seems to be thee perfect time to be an Encourager.  It was brought out that being an encourager is not normally an easy job. How many times have you said something positive to someone and it was shot down with negative or disbelief and you try again and once again it is met with negative.  It's easy to walk away and just give up on saying anything nice.

   I wouldn't say this is something that comes naturally for me. I think for some people it is more of a natural thing or maybe they have practiced it enough in their life and it has become easier for them. But for me I sort of have to purposefully make an effort to encourage. Many times it is just making an effort to say nice things that I am thinking.  Why it is harder to say the nice things I think then some things that are better off left unsaid, I don't know... except that the old man part of me likes to rule.

   So here is my encouragement for the day:  Say something nice to someone today. Smile at the grumpy old man you see. Tell your kids something you love about them. (instead of "put your lunchbox AWAY, the minute they get in the door :)) Tell your husband thank-you for working so hard. Tell the lady at the drive through that God loves Her. Let your kids teachers know how thankful you are that they are there for them each day.

   The list could go on and on. It's sort of fun to come up with something out of the box to do for someone else. But, it does take effort. So go for it!



 

Monday, November 4, 2013

 You know how you feel when you get a brand new notebook and a sharp new pencil and there is a little thrill that runs through you over the wonder of this fresh new start?  Well, maybe it takes more then that to cause a thrill to run through you..... but I guess I am that simple.
  This new blog site feels sort of like that for me. A sense of excitement and a feeling of wanting to start fresh and not mess it up. I want to fill it with words of wisdom, words of humor, and just chatting about life in general.....   there was a (long) time in my life that there wasn't much willy-nilly about it. I "needed" order, organization and all my ducks in a row. God threw a wrench into all that order and now I wonder sometimes if I have a clue what end is up or not. But He is also teaching me to find the good in this new style. To overlook when I don't quite make the "grade". (the grade I made up in the first place)
  Anywho.....  I missed blogging since Xanga went to the sidelines. I missed a chance to just write my heart. So we will see what happens, maybe just maybe I will find a few chances here and there to write again.

    I joined the choir......   I love to sing and I always said I want to sing in a group again. So, when it was offered at church I decided here is my chance. This is a tad bit different from the way I grew up singing. (all acapella) When we learned a song, we sang it till we got it right, either by listening to a recording or to someone who knew it already. I had never sung my part with the keyboard and no soprano to follow. Once in awhile I sort of want to giggle. One of my friends who is also in the alto group was asking me how I was getting a certain note or how I knew. I just said when I hear the soprano it makes sense to me and I can hit it......  she rolled her eyes at me. Don't go asking me which b flat to hit and how to sharp it. I know what those things are but I sing by ear.  Anyway, come December I will be in the Christmas Cantata singing my heart out!  The theme is the "Names of Jesus" and I do love (most) of the songs :).

   As of today I can now say I am a Basket Ball Mom.  I love when my girls play sports. Alexis actually does a lot better academically when she is playing a sport, she knows if she falls below all A-B's she can't play. But it also gives her exercise that she wouldn't do otherwise and I am a firm believer that exercise sharpens the brain. That's a fact, Jack! I get a bit overwhelmed at all the different pick ups, drop offs, and games etc.... but hopefully I can manage it all.  I did discover I am not a fan of being a Cheer Leading Mom....  The 4th grade can't play any of the sports at school so I thought I would let McKayla participate in the cheer leading for a this year.  That was a mistake....  I know there is great controversy but it's not a sport :). There is just too much drama. I decided they don't work them hard enough and they don't get worn out so they can spit spat back and forth.  It was cute, but not again......

    There is a smidgen of the willey-nillyness in my life. It is "fixin' " to get a lot nillier as the holidays come, new workers to train, lots of decisions on our plate, but it's all good. Maybe next time around I will tackle some of the thoughts that have been rolling around.....  I have been reading the book "Idol Lies" and it's a good read. Now if I can apply it.